Being Present is a Gift!
Most of us have learned to pay attention when someone else is speaking. We have all experienced a conversation with someone who isn’t fully present. It can be disheartening and shut down any vulnerability. It often confirms that the disinterested listener is more concerned and focused on themselves and what they have to say in reply. Or worse, they are not genuinely there to connect or help.
Even when making eye contact, a wandering mind is easy to spot and often exacerbates the hurt and isolation someone may be feeling.
When we come to a conversation without being fully committed to hearing what the other person has to say and with the goal of replying, our thoughts will wander away from the conversation or toward a response to something we heard.
Being present means being fully conscious of the moment and free from the noise of internal dialogue. When connecting soul to soul, the only agenda is to be fully attentive to what the other person has to say, with the goal of entering into and understanding their story.
When you are willing and committed to rescuing a hurting person, the second step is to be fully present and listen with the intent to understand. When a hurting person encounters someone who is fully present and genuinely listening, without judgment or advice, they can experience a range of emotions and sensations that contribute to their healing.
Being present means being fully conscious of the moment, and fully engaged with their story, free from noise and distractions.
You are there to sit with them in their suffering and be ready to listen when they want to talk about their pain. You have to resist the temptation to talk or react to their story. You have to be okay with silence and let them tell their story at their own pace. You are not there to tell him/her how to feel or how you feel about their story. And you don’t need to try to fix their circumstances, even if it seems obvious to you. Don’t quote scripture or try to put their hardship in perspective… You are giving them the gift of listening to their story with the intent to understand their pain.