Have you ever been at a loss for words, feeling unsure and inadequate, when someone opens up and shares something deeply painful with you?
Has that fear of saying the wrong thing—or not knowing what to say at all—kept you from engaging when you see someone who may be hurting?
Or, when someone you’re talking with shares their painful circumstances, it’s easier to stay silent, change the subject, or offer a quick fix just to ease the discomfort.
I get it, I’ve been the one scrambling silently for the right thing to say when I bump into someone who is hurting—wanting to help, but not knowing how. Thankfully, I’m more prepared now.
Our mission at Live-Connected is to equip you and instill confidence when you encounter broken people struggling in hard places. It can be overwhelming when someone you know or meet is overwhelmed with their personal story of pain, conflict, anguish, confusion, or heartbreak. But instead of avoiding them in fear, you can be ready to provide comfort, guidance, empathy, and hope when it matters most.
When you hear:
- “I feel so depressed and hopeless. I don’t think I can go on like this.”
- “My spouse just told me he/she loves someone else and wants out. What do I tell the kids?”
- “I lost my job and we’re living paycheck to paycheck.”
- “I’m so scared. My cancer is back.”
In those moments, panic grips you. You know what they need is real comfort, wisdom, maybe even hope. But all you can offer is a blank stare. A nervous “Oh, wow. I’m sorry.”
Or maybe—a well-meaning cliché that doesn’t really help…I’ll pray for you. Or, and you’re not alone, one of the most common and honest responses is: “I just don’t know what to say.”
Even though I still find myself humbled by the weight of someone else’s pain, there is a script that can bring healing for soul-level struggles…and living-connected with the brokenhearted.
Introducing: When You Don’t Know What To Say Blog Series
This blog kicks off a new series designed to equip you to walk alongside people in pain in a practical, compassionate, and biblically grounded way. No longer be afraid or feel inadequate about knowing what to say or do.
In each post, we’ll take a real-life scenario—things people are actually facing—and break down how to respond with empathy, presence, validation, and hope—not with magic words but with meaningful connection.
And we’ll do it all through the lens of our Six Steps of Living-Connected, a framework developed to help people move from helpless bystanders to loving companions in someone else’s struggle.
The Six Steps of Living-Connected
Here’s a quick look at the framework that will guide this series:
- See the Person, Not Just the Problem
Learn to slow down and recognize the hurting person in front of you. - Acknowledge Their Pain Without Judgment
Validate their emotions. Don’t fix, correct, compare, or minimize. - Offer Presence Over Platitudes
You don’t need to have the right words—just the right heart. - Listen Deeply and Be Genuinely Curious
Be slow to speak. Ask questions. Let them open the door to their story. - Step Into Their Pain, and Validate What They Are Experiencing
Sharing in someone’s pain is a gift that brings healing. - Encourage Faith Without Forcing It
Be a gentle reminder of hope, and without preaching or pushing, bring them closer to Jehovah Rapha–The God Who Heals.
What to Expect in This Series
Over the next several blogs, we’ll explore how to better respond in specific, everyday situations like:
- When someone’s marriage is falling apart
- When a friend is facing terminal illness
- When a loved one is overwhelmed by fear
- When someone is depressed and isolating
- When someone shares that they are facing financial collapse
- When someone is grieving a loss
- When you encounter someone who is homeless
Each post will offer real examples, insights, and a practical action step to stop feeling incapacitated and respond in ways that bring healing and hope.
You don’t have to be a counselor to do soul-healing work.
You don’t have to be a pastor to bring comfort and peace to the brokenhearted.
You just have to be willing to live-connected, to lean in when others are tempted to pull away.
Whether you’re a friend, spouse, parent, coworker, caretaker, or ministry leader, God has placed people in your path for a reason. And He’s given you what you need to walk with them: not perfect words, but a faithful, compassionate presence.
Let’s learn together how to show up when it matters most.
Let’s walk into hard places—not with fear, but with love.
Let’s experience what it’s like to connect soul-to-soul in a way that heals.
Welcome to the Living-Connected series: When You Don’t Know What to Say
Next up: What to Say to Someone with a Broken Marriage.